I, Poutine!

It’s easy to stereotype Democratic Deform Minister Pierre Poilievre as the prototypical Little ShitTM, for whom hatred in the heart of Liberals, feminists and the CBC preceded fuzz on the honourable ‘nads. Indeed, it can be hard to stop.

Who better, though, to perfect Canadian democracy by jamming through, with a refreshing chaser of time allocation and a side order of every procedural eye-gouge in the book, the Awesome Elections Act, than the former robocall artiste?

Back in his terrible twenties, Pierre and fellow neocon pindick Jonathan Denis – now Alberta’s Justice Minister — formed 3D Contact, a full-service political ratfucking company, which was still performing wet-work for Tory MPs in the 2011 running of the reptiles. Few in the Tory caucus can claim more experience in election-fixing.

Among Poilievre’s signature victories was Ezra Levant’s grimy 2001 battle for the Canadian Alliance nomination in Preston Manning’s vacated Calgary Southwest riding. With the help of Poutine, Ezra purged the entire riding board and then waddled effortlessly to the nomination.

“We took out the trash,” Levant exulted to the press, as gracious in victory as in defeat.

Then came Ezra’s martyr moment, stepping aside to give new CA supremo Stephen Harper a quick entry to the House of Commons, his resignation lubricated by a discreet $200,000 payola to cover his, er, campaign expenses to date.

Party poobahs had learned from the Jim Hart debacle, in which the cerebral member for Okanagan-Coquihala was given a $50,000 sweetener to resign his seat for Stockboy Day.

All went swimmingly until Hart, unemployed and impatient about the speed of his payoff, hired a lawyer to put the squeeze on the party, and ended up triggering an RCMP investigation into whether Hart’s deal contravened Criminal Code provisions against buying and selling public office.

So, in order to avoid a reprise, Alliance thingies simply went to their oil patch sponsors, soliciting money for Ezra. Since the cash came from private donors, the party, technically, never bought Ezra off.images

The little pisher almost certainly posted a profit on the deal. His extravagant campaign spending claims rose steadily as the pressure mounted for him to get out of Harper’s way. First it was $100,000, then $120,000, then $150,000 and so on, until, by the time he finally resigned to let Harper in, the risible figure of $250,000 was being floated.

Where did the money come from in the first place? In addition to his voracious fundraising in the Jewish community, Ezra also availed himself of the approximately $90,000 left in the Calgary Southwest kitty from the Manning regime.

So even if Ezra had somehow a quarter of a million dollars in the run-up to the byelection in the ultra-safe seat, as shamelessly claimed, only $160,000 of it had come from his own war chest. That left a tidy $40,000 of the Alliance payout in the clear. His profit margin was likely much healthier.

How much of Ezra’s actual spending went to Poilievre/3D Contact? The answer has been shredded/lost to history.

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One comment on “I, Poutine!
  1. miskwabiman says:

    OY VEY…methinks there might be a lawsuit here somewhere….better I get to law skule sooner than later.

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