Typing 101: Seniors’ Edition

The secret of survival in journalism is to think of one thing to say and go on saying it.
–Auberon Waugh

Here at Frankland Capital Corporation we’re delighted to see Tubby Black return to his Remington, following a 10-week hiatus in the UK.

We have concerns, however, that Canada’s Greatest Living Englishman might be losing his marbles.

Exhibit A:  Tubby’s Sept. 6 epistle in the National Post, in which he excoriates poor President Steve:

“[Harper] is, as the British say, ‘all mouth and no trousers’ – the mouse that roared, a paper polar bear.”

That gibe provoked much titter and retweeting by Tubby acolytes such as Dan Gardner, the former Postmedia typist, and Wodek Szemberg, noted TVO crackpot.

They miss the point.

The line’s a recycle; it’s carbon Black, Tubby repeating himself—the first sign of senility.

Take, for instance, his Feb. 15 Post column in which he was again critical of Harper’s Tories:

“In defence spending, this government, in a British expression, has been ‘all mouth and no trousers.’”

And again in the National Review, July 2010:

“I think that, in the English expression, they are ‘all mouth and no trousers.’”

Black’s first use of the quip goes back to October 2002, in a column by his ventriloquist’s dummy, Mark Steyn: “If Mr. Bush is allowed to go his own way, this strategy of noisy impotence – all mouth and no trousers – will be exposed as a sham.”

Spoken like a true git.

Meanwhile, over at the Globe and Mail, Peggy Wente is also showing signs of early onset.

In a recent whitespace-buster on the joys of aging, La Wente was again recycling old shit:

“My boss has a book on her desk called Managing the Older Employee, which means me, I guess. I suspect it’s full of tips for how to motivate me and get me to use my cellphone.”
–Sept. 6, 2014.

“…my boss thinks I should have one, or at the very least a BlackBerry. She is 16 years younger than I am and she has a book on her desk called Managing the Older Employee.”
–Dec. 26, 2009.

Nurse, Nurse!

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4 comments on “Typing 101: Seniors’ Edition
  1. OJM says:

    I’d never seen “blueboxing” before…excellent word. How about “pre-drivelled” as a synonym?

  2. Linda Hay says:

    How is Black still in Canada ? Wasn’t he supposed to be here on a temporary one year residency following his exit from the Florida big house?

  3. Ottawa0001 says:

    Good question posed by the previous poster. The Harperites made a big deal of the ‘fact’ (despite practically flying the chartered jet themselves to Coleman, Florida, to return Black ‘home’ to Toronto, special delivery on the very day of his release from prison, for his photo-op return to his Bridal Path stone pile, with Babs and the bouncing dogs in tow), that he had clearance to stay in Canada for only a year. The year passed without an explanation anywhere of why the law-and-order Tories did not at that point order him to return to Thatcherland, to which he swore allegiance when he renounced his Canadian citizenship (as “not competitive”) and huffed off to the House of Lords in 2001. Some explanation would be welcome, even at this late date.

  4. Stbarnabas says:

    Why has no journo in the Hill Press Gallery ever asked this question to either Jason Kenny or newboy Chris”talking points” Alexander. Is there some remaining affection for Tubby who signed paycheques for a considerable number of them?

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