So what’s eating Kevin Gaudet?
The former director of the Canadian Taxpayers Federation turned up in the Toronto Sun this week to vent his spleen over Order of Canada recipients.
Poor Kev’s in a sour mood these days—and for good reason.
He’s still recovering from yet another pasting at the hands of the 905 electorate, which makes him oh-for-three in the running of the reptiles dept.
A couple of years ago, he ran for PC Party president, but lost to someone whose name escapes me.
More recently, he got hosed in June’s Ontario provincial election, his second whack at turning the riding of Pickering-Scarborough East Tory blue. First time ’round, in 2011, Angry Kev’ was so hard up for campaign volunteers he had to bribe high-school students with the chance to win an iPad in exchange for helping out.
It was all so much easier back when he was with the CTF, dealing with big issues of the day, like the hidden evil of mascot abuse.
During the 2007 provincial election, Kev’ dreamed up the idea of Fibber the Honesty in Politics Mascot, in which a CTF operative in a Pinocchio costume followed Premier Dalton McWimpy around to campaign events.
Alas, when Fibber showed up at the International Plowing Match in Crosby, Ont., he was confronted by a mob of Liberal thugs: “Fibber was pushed, shoved, stepped on, and various angry comments were heard.” One of the ruffians even threatened to break his 16-inch proboscis.
“The Premier should apologize for the threats of violence against Fibber the CTF Honesty Mascot,” Kevin whinged, in a much-ignored press release.
The old Pinocchio trope was, of course, a time-honoured and endlessly hilarious gag for partisan political ratfuckers, although the CTF, as they never tire of overstating, is “Canada’s leading non-partisan advocacy group dedicated to lower taxes, less waste and accountable government.”
By no means should one let the grisly and homogenous procession of ex-CTF thingies, like Jason Kenney, failed Conservative candidate Walter Robinson, and Little ShitTMTasha Kheiriddin, give one the wrong idea.
Gaudet, in keeping with the CTF’s vaunted non-partisanship, is an old Reform Party braunshirt. Back in the 90s, he was fartcatcher to Calgary Reformer Jan Brown— until she raised concerns about “extremists” in the party like Bob “back o’ the shop” Ringma.
Jan was jackbooted out of caucus for her candour and Gaudet, a loyal Reformer, quit immediately. Computer files containing Jan’s constituency data disappeared with him as he took up a gig with the party’s research bureau.
In 2006, non-partisan Kev’ had to resign from his $350-a-day patronage job with the CPP review tribunal when some buzzkill pointed out he was not just a Tory hack, but also a registered lobbyist.
Now he’s turned his keen mind to the urgent issue of Orders of Canada, complaining in The Sun that his analysis of nearly 6,400 appointments to the Order over 47 years reveals—wait for it—that most recipients are from the “cozy, elitist, nanny-state-supporting, big government loving, cabal of group [sic] narcissistic central Canadians.”
By way of example, Kev’, hauled out the late Dr. Henry Morgentaler, former CBC radio host Andy Barrie and anti-gun activist Wendy Cukier, who all got awards for their “pet progressive causes.” (Cukier didn’t get the OC, but she received an award of merit from the G-G, he grumped.)
Meanwhile, Great Canadians such as Don Cherry and free speech advocate Ezra Levant have been deemed unworthy of awards of any kind from the governor-general.
Apparently Kevin hasn’t been subscribing to the satirical press, otherwise he’d know that Don and Ezra and other Sun Media loudmouths like Michael Coren, Lorne Gunter, Christine Blizzard and Charles Adler, have been honoured by the G-G with Queen’s Diamond Jubilee medals
About the only Sun whacko who missed out?