Maggiemania! The Media is the Massage

Déjà vu all over again for House Trudeau.

Irrepressible First Mom Margaret has rekindled her ruinous affair with the fourth estate, now announcing her boy’s intent to hold off on reclaiming 24 Sussex, now sitting for a soft-focus coffee klatch with Wendy Mesley.

‘Twas ever thus, as underlined when Ottawa Citizen typist Kelly Egan tweeted a 42-year-old interview with the voluble airhead: “There is a point when you start thinking of yourself in terms of consciousness, in terms of your relation to the universe…that starts getting pretty radical,” she blathered trippily to the Toronto Star’s Dan Turner, the profile accompanied by shots of Herself and the infant Justin, then blonde, handsome and ever-so-ready months before his second birthday.

Turner snagged the interview, the first she had ever granted, by virtue of chatting her up on the campaign bus during the 1972 running of the reptiles.

Three short years later, Maggie completely lost her marbles, on a state visit to Central America, singing a soulful ditty to the wife of Venezuelan President Carlos Andres Perez.

Upon her return to Canada, Turner contacted Maggie and asked WTF?

What happened next is uncertain, but one thing led to another and Turner, who had by then left the Tsar and signed with CBC Television in Ottawa, assumed the role of friend and confidante to the increasingly erratic Maggie.

Turner and Maggie

Turner and Maggie

It was Turner who talked her into doing a sycophantic CBC interview that went nation-wide.

So intimate was their relationship that in early April 1977, Turner was able to take it upon himself to announce that the prime minister and his wife were busting up.

None of this is said to have amused overmuch Turner’s wife, the comely Gayle, a leading figure in the world of international development and to whom Turner remains somehow married to this day.

Neither was Pierre particularly chuffed when the Mounties informed him that Maggie had been getting leg-overs with not one but two chaps: Turner and the late and energetic Sen. Ted Kennedy.

Soon all hell broke loose and Maggie was sporting a black eye and running off to share a few spliffs and more with the Rolling Stones and New York Jets.

Nearly 40 years later, Maggie has returned to over-sharing in live interviews with a familiar theme: her troubled past and giddy future.

Meanwhile, Turner, now a crustaceous septuagenarian, has lost whatever spunk he ever had. Sadly, he finds it impossible to give a straight answer to whether he and the Queen Mother used to be horizontal jogging partners.

“There was so much dope smoking going on that it’s all a haze. I mean, did we or didn’t we?” Turner told Frank.

“Think about it. Margaret wrote a book about her life at 24 Sussex. She admits in the book that she provided favours to a ‘southern friend,’ while she was still married to Pierre.

“That would be Ted Kennedy. She told me about him. But there’s not one mention about me, or anybody like me in that book. So we probably didn’t do anything bad.

“On the other hand, the Mounties told the prime minister that we did—I know that. And on the last day of the 1980 election campaign he made a big show of refusing to shake my hand.

“But I asked to see my RCMP file last year, and the Mounties say flatly there is no file. Which seems strange, don’t you think, given all the hanging out she and I did when they were supposedly protecting her?

“Anyway, bottom line—there is no Mountie file. So you pretty well have to conclude that we didn’t do anything really bad.

“Er, don’t you?”

No Geraldo Rivera, he.

Readers may recall the Faux News senior narcissist, in his 1991 bio Exposing Myself, recalled his ride on the Maggie-go-round: “It was like she had never been made love to before,” Rivera penned. “It was like she was unleashing years of pent-up frustration.”

Is it any wonder poor Maggie had to go south to get any action?

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4 comments on “Maggiemania! The Media is the Massage
  1. Trippetta says:

    So Turner doesn’t remember anything when he’s in one of his stoned stupors.

  2. stagetek says:

    Not much sport dragging a bi-polar person in front of cameras. What’s next, televised bum fights?

  3. Steve-O says:

    After her son’s swearing-in ceremony yesterday, Maggie had little to say to the press. She simply said that she was proud of her son and was going home. Maybe Justin is getting nervous and has asked his mom not to be so talkative with the media people.

  4. daveS says:

    And Ian Austen barely mentions Frank Magazine in his piece “Fashion & Style | The Quiet Comeback of Margaret Trudeau” November 07 2015

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