The Corpse: Million-Dollar Mansbridge

A tip of the Frank turban to Peter Mansbridge, the CBC’s new million-dollar man.

How the glabrous bingo caller became the highest-paid TV star in the land is a convoluted tale that goes back a couple of years, when CBC was embroiled in the paid speaking gig fiasco.

Readers will recall that shit storm, as it was revealed how prominent CBC meat puppets, among them Mansbridge, Amanda Lang and Rex Murphy, had been showered with dosh by Canadian Association of Petroleum Producers and Manulife.

Indeed, it turned out that Lang, then-CBC’s chief business corro, made more money talking about her job than actually doing it. Lang raked in an estimated $300K a year for speaking to her Bay Street buddies.

Mansbridge hisself pocketed nearly $200,000 in 2014, on 13 gigs worth $15,000-$20,000 a pop. (Peterkins has always maintained that he gave a portion of his speaking proceeds to charity–just how much we don’t know. But we take Canada’s second-most trusted news anchor at his word.)

Enter Jesse Brown and various Guardians of Journalistic Integrity™ to mount a Twitter campaign demanding that all CBC employees must henceforth eschew (bless you!!—ed.) paid appearances, lest they give rise to the perception of conflict of interest (wat dat!?—ed.)

Eventually, Corpse management capitulated and banned their televisual toastmasters from accepting pay for prattle.

Mansbridge reacted poorly; “incandescent with rage,” was how one CBC colleague described it.

And who can blame him? After all those years of raking in thousands of dollars for sharing his deep thoughts at the Muskoka Moose Lodge, Mansbridge had been kicked where it hurt most, below the money belt.

Mansbridge protested that he was being unfairly deprived of his rightful emoluments. He’d been making outside appearances for years and he had a reasonable expectation they’d continue. Further, CBC management was not only fully aware of his moonlighting, they approved it!

So Mansbridge demanded the Corpse make up the shortfall, or else he’d unleash his legal weasels.

Given the Ghomeshi/Lang PR disasters, Corpse brass wanted desperately to make it all go away, so they capitulated, awarding Mansbridge an extra $100K to alleviate his hardship.

How much of that extra $100K goes to charities is the million-dollar question.

As for the rest of the Corpse news stiffs, here’s a list of top earners. Our impeccable CBC sources swear that, give or take a zero, our numbers are accurate within $50,000, nine times out of eight.

Mansbridge: $1.05-Million Another two years service and Petey will be eligible for a gold watch for half a century of punching the Corpse clock. Fifty years a baggage handler!

Wendy Mesley: $335,000 At the CBC, seniority counts (these are government jobs, after all). No matter that you’re hosting a show buried in a lineup that nobody watches, it’s all about pensionable time. With 35 years on the job, la Mez qualifies for Corpse senior citizenry.

Terry Milewski: $305,000Second only to Mansbridge in years of service with 38. Still breaks stories. That works out to about $100K per scoop over the course of a year.

Ian Hanomansing: $290,000 Proven lawyer. CBC lifer since 1986.

Carole MacNeil: $260,000 Buried in the NewsNet afternoon sked. Much respected because she dumped dreaded former Corpse boss Richard Stursberg. Has clocked 29 years with the Corpse.

Neil Macdonald: $245,000 CBC Westboro correspondent. Years of service: 25.

Diana Swain: $250,000 CBC Toronto lip-mover is only 51, but has logged 26 years at the Corpse.

 

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2 comments on “The Corpse: Million-Dollar Mansbridge
  1. John MacLachlan Gray says:

    A million dollars a year & he still refuses to move his upper lip.

  2. Muldoon's NyQuil says:

    His cup runneth over!

    As loyal readers of the frankmag.ca community well know, we here at the Muldoon Estates NyQuil Vineyard™ have a deep well of respect for The Mothership Corpse™. The rotating door of assorted bingo-dudes, Baba Wawa Wannabees, lackeys and sycophants is simply the price of doing business for such high-quality programming. Why begrudge the persevering and perky talking heads their just desserts? Taxpayer largesse don’t come cheap! If they can make a little cheese on the side, what’s the harm, I say?!

    While we love ourselves all manner of CBC salary-dirt here at the NyQuil Smoothie Bar™, no one spreads the internet love for the CBC and Peter Mansbridge like the McCain Pizza-Pocket Think-Tank™ over at Reddit.com.

    CBC October 2015 Election Night thread:

    “MY FAVOURITE PART OF ANY ELECTION IS WATCHING PETER MANSBRIDGE BECOME INCREASINGLY TIRED AND CRANKY AS THE NIGHT DRAGS ON.”

    MechaCanadaII: I wish Peter Mansbridge was my dad only so he could teach me to scorn and dismantle the opinions of other people.

    DarkRapunzel_North: My first adult memory of Peter Mansbridge is from 2001, the day of the World Trade Centre attacks. I was sitting on the couch after school (I was 17) watching the coverage. He looked so haggard. At about 8:30 pm Eastern time I changed the channel to “give him a break.”

    Supercantaloupe: I find Peter Mansbridge and Lloyd Robertson’s voices so comforting. Whenever there has been a big event one of those guys has been there for us. Either one of could tell me I’m going to die and I’d totally be okay with it.

    MechaCanadaII: I kinda feel like Peter Mansbridge is the Dad of Canada. My husband says “if Peter Mansbridge is the Dad of Canada, then Don Cherry is the crazy uncle.”

    GrumplogicNunavut: “I kinda feel like Peter Mansbridge is the Dad of Canada.” – Then what does that make Lloyd Robertson?

    CorialisSaskatchewan: Grandpa

    RackEmUp: My fave so far was seeing him get annoyed at playing the traditional “look how much hair Peter has lost with video clips of every election he has covered” montage.

    Baconwiches: Fun fact: Peter Mansbridge and Wendy Mesley were married from 1989 to 1992.

    Go_Habs_Go!: That is a fun fact! Edit: Wendy Mesley looks great for 58.

    RagingNerdaholic: Is it just me, or has Rex lost every last fuck he had to give?

    Anonymous: I was always under the impression that he’s never even had one.

    Villain_of_BrandonManitoba: I agree, owls DGAF about what anyone thinks.

    Robynmichelle: He does look like an owl!! Never noticed that. My dad always says that Rex looks like a turkey’s ass. He says “Rex Murphy and a turkey’s ass entered a turkey’s ass lookalike contest and Rex Murphy won”. Dads…

    DeeJayFreshOntario: Rex has this mascot sort of likability to him. The guy says what he wants and gives no fucks cause he prepares it himself.

    Mustard-Tiger: He looked pretty rough tonight, my dad said he looked like a zombie from The Walking Dead.

    Ganglebot: I agree, he’s not looking well. I like that despite his appearance, he is respected enough to still be put on the air. I may not agree with him, but I respect his perspective on issues if only to give me a counter-argument to think about.

    Godblow: He looked super exhausted. There’s been a flu going around Toronto, so it probably took him a great deal of effort to even make it down there.

    Zzyzx00Nova Scotia: “There’s been a flu going around Toronto”
    I’m home sick today but at least now I know where I got it from – Damn you Rex Murphy!!

    DaftFunky: Who is the blonde cutie sitting behind Rex?

    Immightbecrazy: Chantal Hebert is also amazing – she’s so smart!

    AjWest: The way she knows her stuff is incredible. It makes me want to consult her on all of my life decisions.

    YesssiCanada: I like the Barton [Rosemary]-Mansbridge combo

    Compressthesound: Best power couple.

    Hairsprayking : I must be the only one who can’t stand him anymore.

    Thunder-Ass: I started watching because of this post, every time someone says something Peter Mansbridge gives you a few reasons why they sound like an idiot. I couldn’t imagine anyone better to tell me about election results than a grumpy old man making people look stupid.

    ****
    Soundtrack:
    Pink Floyd
    ‘Money’
    Dark Side of the Moon
    HD (Studio Version)
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpbbuaIA3Ds

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