The Twidiocy: Norm Sayin’?!
Over the years, Norman Spector has become a fixture on social media, eagerly trolling TROC from his retirement home in Victoria. Never mind that he’s always three hours behind, the Great Spectoracle remains utterly convinced he’s got his finger up the pulse of the nation.
Alas, that intransigence has proven costly to Norm in the past, like the time he was totally taken in by the shopworn Ottawa gossip that Laureen Harper had left President Steve in favour of a female Mountie assigned to the Harpers’ security detachment.
By the time Spector heard about it on the Left Coast, the ancient tattle was two years old and had long been dismissed as wild-eyed gossip invented by Liberal mischief-makers.
Norm, however, smelled cover-up and went public with his musings in his Globe column.
Within hours, his loopy speculation had been purged from the paper and replaced with the disclaimer: “It fell short of the Globe and Mail’s editorial standards with respect to fairness, balance and accuracy.”
He soon vanished from the Globe and sank further into well-earned obscurity, polishing his Porsches and tweeting deep thoughts to his loyal following of UNIX nerds and neckbeards:
A recent sample:
-“For those who’ve been wondering about the rotisserie chicken at The Ruby on Johnson. It’s back to being the best in Canada.”
-“I’m blocking you.”
-“You have a right to unfollow.”
-“The Holocaust was about burning babies alive in ovens.”
-“Hey, @StarbucksCanada, what’s with your Sumatra decaf beans? They’ve become has-beens in Victoria for the past 3 months.”
-“You have no idea what I believe, so f**k off.”
Norm’s har-de-har was soon re-tweeted by another partisan Tory hack, Linda Frum, which didn’t go down well with Quebec pundit Marty Patriquin: “@lindafrum liked this tweet, which suggests that Trudeau…what? Is a predator? That he enables/causes predatory behaviour?”
Frum, to her credit, deleted the tweet. Spector, however, despite fellow traveller Ken Whyte’s suggestion he cut the prime minister some slack, since celebrity pix are a “hazard of public life,” doubled down and retweeted a couple more times for good measure.
Bluto gonna Bluto.