“I was reckless in almost all areas of my life: financially, socially, sexually and vocationally…”

You try saying “Sorry I lopped that guy’s head off” with a straight face
There’s a guy walking about freely in Toronto bragging to the media about going abroad to join the Islamic State…. So why hasn’t he been charged? [I]t appears that there are cases when the RCMP and prosecutors make the discretionary choice to not lay charges even when they could. Back in 2016, then RCMP commissioner Bob Paulson told media that in the case of some radicals they don’t arrest them because “we assessed that they’re back, they’re sorry, they’re working to try to get their heads straight….” You read that right: Some jihadists get off free if they say sorry…. He’s flaunting his ISIS credentials. He’s laughing at us.
—Anthony Furey, Toronto Sun, May 14, 2018.

Ahem, prophet-without-honour alert
My assessment of Palin at the convention was predictive and accurate, though unpopular at the time, and I would have loved to see her find some way to civilize herself. (A decade later, she has yet to do this.) It’s good for a journalist to be right, one amused editor told me later, but it’s not pleasant to be the first to do it. And a few weeks later, like an overturning boat that manages to right itself in the water, every normal person agreed with me that Palin was a Mama Grizzly embarrassment.
—Heather Mallick, Toronto Star, May 8, 2018.

OK, we’ll buy the financially, socially and vocationally, but, c’mon, sexually?
The London West candidate for Ontario’s Progressive Conservatives, Andrew Lawton, is asking voters for their “compassion and trust” for controversial remarks he made during a period when he says he was “reckless” in almost all areas of his life.  Lawton…took to social media on Monday to tell voters his controversial actionsbetween 2005 and 2013 were a product of his struggles with mental illness….

“While that discussion has centred on my 2010 suicide attempt, in actuality it was a battle that spanned from 2005 to 2013…. I was reckless in almost all areas of my life: financially, socially, sexually and vocationally…. I was active on social media throughout much of this time, posting things that are so far removed from who I am and what I stand for that I can’t even fathom my frame of mind in writing them.”
—Reported by cbc.ca, May 8, 2018.

Aragorn Bacon has a nice ring to it
Carleton University’s new president, Benoit-Antoine Bacon, has a PhD in psychology and has spent his career studying the mysteries of cognitive neuroscience….

  1. What is your favourite colour?
    I enjoy all wavelengths of the visible spectrum and their perceptual correlates….
  2. Who are your heroes in real life?
    Anyone who faces reality as it is and consciously chooses to live.
  3. Who are your favourite heroines of history?
    Rosa Parks and Thérèse Casgrain.
  4. What are your favourite names?
    Adriana like my daughter and Aragorn.
  5. What is it you most dislike?
    Self-serving half-truths, especially my own….
  6. How would you like to die?
    Just in time.
  7. What is your present state of mind?
    One hemisphere in the present, the other in the future.
  8. What is your motto?
    Patience, humility, discipline … gratitude!
Bacon takes over as president of Carleton University on July 1.
—Jacquie Miller, Ottawa Citizen, May 3, 2018 |

Brad reveals, “Next time, I’ll hire Molly Maid first!”
The baby that 49-year-old Jennifer Aniston’s dusty womb just refuses to create is, for the trillionth time, on a magazine cover anyhow. Jen and Brad Pitt have “reconnected”—what a nice euphemism! as clean or as dirty as you like!—and now an insider says “I can definitely see them having a child together” without adding, “Well, I can’t literally see it, but if I put this drinking glass against the door I think I can hear them trying.”
—Garnet Fraser, Toronto Star, May 13, 2018.

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2 comments on ““I was reckless in almost all areas of my life: financially, socially, sexually and vocationally…”
  1. OJM says:

    Should have asked him “What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?”.

  2. Forbes Kennedy says:

    Can’t someone just hold a pillow down over Heather’s head?

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