Legally Ivanka: The Great $25M Bail Fail

A tip of the Frank periwig to Ontario Attorney General Ivanka Muldoon, the impeccably tailored and pedigreed salesthingy for the Tories’ latest $25-million giftie to cops and Crowns in the name of fighting guns and gangs.

Quoth Premier Doug: “We are giving our police the cutting-edge tools that they need to fight drug gangs and gun criminals in 2018.” (shurely ‘rack up overtime staking out Tim Horton’s?!’ –ed.)

Of the boodle, $7.6 million will go to “legal SWAT teams” of Crowns to oppose bail for anyone charged with an offence involving a firearm.

“Those who commit violent gun offences belong behind bars, and not on bail,” declares Muldoon in the government release.

Alas, in taking that little-used law degree at NYU, our Ivanka appears to have missed the day they covered presumption of innocence, which applies to to local gang-bangers of colour, just as it does to bribe-taking former prime ministers.

To recap: Those who commit violent gun offences are already behind bars. It’s accused persons what get bail, pending an actual, er, trial.

And if they’re accused of a gun crime, they may as well make themselves comfortable. Since 2005, the Ontario Crown Policy Manual has instructed  prosecutors to go into such cases with elbows up: “At all stages of the prosecution, from bail to sentencing, the prosecution of firearms offences should be premised on providing the greatest protection to the community, not on considerations of expediency.”

As a result, while it’s still possible for those charged with gun crimes to get bail, it’s vanishingly rare, and always opposed by the Crown.

One lucky exception was extended to former Duffer Harris cabmin John Snobelen, sprung on bail in 2007 after flatfeet found a Colt .22 handgun hidden behind a vent in his bathroom. Snobelen, ratted out by his estranged wife, ultimately pled guilty to possession of a restricted weapon and careless storage of a firearm.

In the interim, the at-risk high school dropout, accused gun criminal and known Tory walked our streets. But now, at long last, something is being done!

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7 comments on “Legally Ivanka: The Great $25M Bail Fail
  1. Serenitynow says:

    Guns …. Guns …. We don’t need no stinkin” guns. Er – wait till I take it out of the bathroom and store it properly yer honour.

  2. Papadoc says:

    What on earth has Muldoon’s large seatmate Lisa MacLeod found in her nose?

  3. John MacLachlan Gray says:

    Ivanka’s alliteration suggests she didn’t make up the line herself. Same with
    Doug’s “legal swat teams”. Who is writing these second-rate Republicanisms?

    • OJM says:

      Truly…you wonder what she’s thinking: “I’ve begun my political career as Doug Ford’s factotum, meaning I have to get up in public and reel off Trump-lite inanities scribbled out by some little shithead creep who happens to be a friend of Jenni Bryne’s…but, hey, I’m Ontario’s Attorney-General, so it’s all good.”

  4. OJM says:

    Is there a criminologist in the house? How often does it occur that someone charged with a gun-related crime commits another violent offence while out on bail?

  5. daveS says:

    Anyone have a still during the Cannabis-in-all-the-stores press briefing when Ivanka bites and swallows her lower lip/chin?

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