Warren Kinsella’s Hedley punk-out

I am on my [odyssey of feminist self-discovery] to be a better man. So, what is a feminist?  Not me, not yet.  I am trying to get to that distant shore, but I still have a long way to go, and I still have many sins for which I must atone.
–Warren Kinsella

How curious to see Warren Kinsellout maintaining a discreet silence on the subject of Jacob Hoggard, lead singer for Hedley, who was charged with sexual assault this week, after an Ottawa woman claimed she was demeaned, choked and forced to have vaginal and anal sex.

Customarily, this is the kind of juicy hanky spanky that arouses a born again feminist like Warren. Consider, for example, how he led the campaign to lynch Justin Trudeau for his ancient ass-patting misdemeanours in Creston (Franks passim.)

But while Kinsella’s fellow fems were celebrating the charges against Hoggard, from the Kinsella camp came there crickets.

That’s quite a volte face for the punk poseur, who only four months ago was welcoming Hoggard with open arms, after his former reps, Navigator spin weasels, realized they had a PR nightmare of Ghomeshiesque proportions on their hands and quickly punted.

Enter a mysterious outfit called the Green Light Group, which announced it was Hedley’s new public relations firm.

The Green Light Group, as it transpired, was a satellite company to Kinsella’s Daisy Consulting–a surrogate operation, run by Warren’s wife, Lisa, where awkward clients and uncomfortable questions could be stashed, away from prying eyes. https://twitter.com/GreenLight_TO/followers?lang=en

After all, just imagine the embarrassment if the Kinsella-Hedley connection ever got ou—whoopsie! Lisa’s name was attached to the Green Light press release and inquiring minds were soon demanding to know wtf? How come Mr. & Mrs. #MeToo were the mouthpieces for someone charged with unpermitted packings of the peanut butter?

When entertainment writer Caleb Stark suggested on Twitter that it was rank hypocrisy for Lisa, self-styled women’s rights activist, to take on sexual predators as clients, Warren had Stark served with a libel notice.

Warren then announced he had “fired” Hedley–just like he “fired” Olivia Chow and so many others, after the truth became too uncomfortable.


6 comments on “Warren Kinsella’s Hedley punk-out
  1. John MacLachlan Gray says:

    Another PR problem for could be that the name “Hedley” might draw unkind attention to Mr. Kinsella’s macrocephalic head.

  2. daveS says:

    Warren might call it megacephaly.

  3. SaneMan says:

    I think microcephaly is more likely the condition.

  4. Forbes Kennedy says:

    Warren should slap himself on the fivehead.

  5. theodorestreet says:

    This is distressing that a rock star as famous as Jacob Hoggard with stray outside the boundaries of rock and roll sexual etiquette. Here is a famous quote from Ronnie Hawkins explaining the benefits of a career in this line of work — to Robbie Robertson: You’ve heard this before. Jacob I am disappointed. I am very disappointed in your poor technique…

    Here’s the quote..

    He called me up, and I said, “Sure I’d like a job. What does it mean? What do I do?” And he said, “Well, son, you won’t make much money, but you’ll get more pussy than Frank Sinatra.”

  6. Marty says:

    Warren’s forehead grows an inch with every day of hypocrisy, petulance, unawareness and self-importance that passes him by. I swear you could fit the entire list of people he’s sued, threatened to sue or has put on his black-list. And if doesn’t fit on there, there’s plenty of space on that foot-wide neck.

    Sad to think this is all because Trudeau’s crew didn’t want to be his friend and Warren just doesn’t know how to handle rejection like an adult.

    Side note: He looks like a man who never quite figured out how to dress himself after adolescence. Shirt sleeve is way too long and suit jack is way too short. Really, really doesn’t flatter his whole Patrick Star body shape.