“The president can’t get involved in the Moore affair. [T]he Democrats are trying to bait him again, into the misogyny issue, another complete fabrication.”

Home of the bespoke cliché

—Frank, May 31, 2017.

The realm of higher learning is such a tenebrous thicket of extravagance, faddishness and oppressive political correctness that it is almost a no-go area for anyone seeking any reforms
Conrad, Lord Tubby, National Post, Nov. 11, 2017.

It’s all part of the same conspiracy, I tell you!
It is hard not to look upon the Roy Moore imbroglio as another well-timed hit-job from a familiar and well-practiced source—the same people who thought they had destroyed the Trump campaign by releasing the Billy Bush tape from eleven years before…. With the other earmarks of a well-planned assault, disposing of Moore and slicing the Republican Senate majority to a knife-edge, the Democrats and their media allies left it to just one month before the runoff election…. I don’t like Roy Moore as a candidate, but…electioneering by severe partisan defamation unleashed at critically timed pre-electoral moments should not be rewarded with success.
Conrad, Lord Tubby, National Review, Nov. 14, 2017.

Republican primary voters   selected as their champion a person who seeks to suppress the civil rights of his fellow citizens and defies the law whenever it suits his ideological and political purposes. Even before today’s allegations, he was unfit to be a United States senator.  Now the question is whether he’s dangerous, unfit, and vile.
   —David French, National Review, Nov. 9, 2017.

It is an issue because of the acute sensitivity to physical harassment of women and even greater public outrage about any form of abuse of minors. Both are well-founded and justly righteous public attitudes. Their application in this case is mitigated by the absence of authoritative corroboration, any seriously alleged pattern of repeated misconduct (as in the Weinstein allegations), and the fact that the alleged incident [sic] is violently denied by the former chief justice of the state, occurred 38 years ago, did not involve any direct physical grope or probe, was not reported to law authorities…and was given instead to the trusty first battery of reliable Democratic artillery in the media.
Conrad, Lord Tubby, op. cit.

 None of Moore’s accusers are liberal journalists working for the Washington Post, though. And Beverly Young Nelson stipulated that she and her husband voted for Donald Trump last year…. At this point, there are two options: Either several different women who don’t know one another have decided to take the enormous personal risk of making up stories about Roy Moore in a vast political conspiracy, or a          politician caught up in a scandal with every incentive to dissemble is doing it—and not very well.
   —Rich Lowry, National Review, Nov. 14, 2017.

It is a reasonable supposition that most people in public life have something not much less embarrassing than this in their backgrounds that remain unknown, one form of misconduct or another. It is also true that even if this incident occurred, as long as it was not repeated, it does not disqualify Moore from being a senator, if he has had 38 subsequent years of unexceptionable sexual and romantic conduct. However, the Democrats and their media allies can usually be relied upon to drum up some sort of after-outcry of the long-silent aggrieved, and they started to come out of the woodwork on Monday.
Conrad, Lord Tubby, op. cit.

[T]he Post has offered an enormous amount of evidence.  Moore’s defenders are simply shouting “fake news!”         “Soros!” “Narrative!” and other inanities—because that’s all they’ve got. And for what? To defend a man who was indefensible before the Post story.
   —Jonah Goldberg, National Review, Nov. 9, 2017.

The president can’t get involved in the Moore affair. [T]he Democrats are trying to bait him again, into the misogyny issue, another complete fabrication.
—Conrad, Lord Tubby, op. cit.

 The allegations against Roy Moore are disgusting — and if  you find yourself reluctant to say so because of your politics, then you’re pretty gross, too.
   —Katherine Timpf, National Review, Nov. 11, 2017.

 Trump’s dilemma is a unique one: how can he condemn Moore for facing accusations similar to those that he himself has faced…? Trump has been accused of sexual harassment or assault by at least 16 women. He has also faced allegations of raping a 13-year-old and of doing the same to his first wife….
   —Jason Le Miere, Newsweek, Nov. 16, 2017.

To Me, with Love
Quality teaching should be rewarded and our high-school youth should be liberated from the shackles of collectivized mediocrity. I was a tutor in a U.S. federal prison for more than two years. My students were far from the cream of the American educational crop, but…every one of my lads matriculated.
—Conrad, Lord Tubby, National Post, Nov. 3, 2017.

Actually, it’s pretty much the same solution I have for every problem
Last week, I discussed deteriorating results in Ontario students’ mathematics tests, but had little space to lay out broader views on education. Apart from decertifying the teachers’ unions and banning the right to strike in the public service, and invoking the notwithstanding clause where necessary to vacate judicial decisions that would impede those steps, I think the school boards should be abolished as useless and redundant, the teachers’ colleges should be seriously reoriented, the Ontario Institute for Studies in Education should be entirely repurposed, teachers and students should be tested objectively every year, and those who fail should be allowed to fail. Teachers…must also behave as learned professionals, and irresponsible emulation of industrial trade unions should be responded to by impounding their immense pension funds pending resolution of all material issues.
—Conrad, Lord Tubby, National Post, Nov. 10, 2017.

Hey, what about that time the United States elected a deranged, pussy-grabbing reality TV star as their president? Now, that ‘s embarrassing!
I have scoured the American and some international media in vain to find any recognition of what a Gordian knot of absurdity the investigative pretzel of official Washington has become…. If this all sounds like the Hound of the Baskervilles chasing its tail, that is because it is that and more: The hound has caught its own tail and devoured itself from behind to the point that it has become a deformed biped…. Even the most febrile conspiracy theorist could not make up such a convoluted story. It is bunk, rubbish, a Babylonian ziggurat of pompous and officious suppositions and confections that…no sane person could take seriously…. After all the revelations of Trump-Russian collusion as the ultimate nothingburger, it is time for the curtain on this fatuous charade that his enemies pretend is a sword of Damocles looming over Donald Trump’s distinctly coiffed head…. This is the most demeaning self-inflicted embarrassment a Great Power has had since Lin Biao, the second-ranking Chinese leader under Mao Tse-tung, cleared his drugged-out mind by inhaling motorcycle fumes, commandeered an aircraft to flee after a failed coup attempt, and was shot down over Mongolia by Mao’s loyal air force in 1971.
—Conrad, Lord Tubby, National Review, Nov. 7, 2017.

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8 comments on ““The president can’t get involved in the Moore affair. [T]he Democrats are trying to bait him again, into the misogyny issue, another complete fabrication.”
  1. Papadoc says:

    It is fortunate for Tubs that his editors don’t apply the same standards to his writing that he proposes for the Ontario educational system.

  2. RoddyPiper says:

    Given that Roy Moore’s chances of becoming President and giving Tubby a pardon are as close to zero as it’s possible to get, I don’t know why His Lardship is embarrassing himself like this. Off his medication, perhaps?

  3. OJM says:

    “If all this sounds like the Hound of the Baskervilles chasing its tail that is because it is that and more: The hound has caught its own tail and devoured itself from behind to the point where it has become a deformed biped.”

    That is so completely fucked up…is he channeling Salvador Dali now?

  4. John MacLachlan Gray says:

    Frank has some tough competition: today’s issue of the National Post contains a classic of unconscious self-satire that could easily be a Frank exercise in biased and unfair mockery..

  5. Patrick60 says:

    I never cease to be amazed at the degree of Lord Tubby’s verbal eloquence and facility when his mouth is obstructed by Donald Trump’s dick.

  6. Stephen says:

    Sadly, given the limited news sources viewed or reported to Trump, he may actually get to read or hear about Tubby’s fluffers and be flattered. If his Lordship rises to the level of a bottom crawler at Fox, he may have a chance at a pardon. Time to double down M’Lard.

  7. daveS says:

    I liked Jeremy Nuttall’s explanation/comment.

    “Honey, the cat’s been walking over the computer keyboard again.”

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