A Trade War’s Better Than No War At All!

I’m tryin’ to look on the bright side of this peace in Korea deal, but I been hopin’ to see a genuine nuclear exchange before the Good Lord sees my clogs finally pop so yes, this one hurts.

But let’s be honest, the first Korean War wasn’t much to write home about anyway. I know because my brother wrote home all the time and it got so I couldn’t be bothered readin’ ’em.

He was captured twice an’ had both ears shot off, but the kid couldn’t tell a story to save his life. And it didn’t.

So it’ll be Iran, then, in the crosshairs of Johnny Bolton’s moustache. I can’t complain. The mullahs know how to put on a good show with Infidel this and Great Satan that, and I don’t care for Persian dates anyhow so who gives a crap?

Until then of course we got this trade war to get our juices flowin’. At least they better be ours, because you’ll be payin’ a hefty premium on American juices, I promise you.

All I gotta decide now is what side I’m on.

On the one hand, there’s the fact of me bein’ Canadian as hell. But on the other there’s Donny Trump.

I’m the last fella to be unpatriotic, but this time it’s personal. Or maybe personality.

And we got a Prime Minister who should just shut his toke hole and lie there like a yoga mat for the President to strike poses on.

I was never big on NAFTA, not even before it was opened up to include Mexicans and women. I can admit this now that he’s dead, but John Turner had a point. And if he isn’t dead then don’t wake him.

Politics is queer, how now it’s a Liberal Prime Minister what makes defendin’ NAFTA the fight of his life.

Queer and boring, let’s never forget that.




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2 comments on “A Trade War’s Better Than No War At All!
  1. OJM says:

    Bolt a 50 cal to his motorized buggy, pack a couple weeks supply of Depends in his rucksack, point him in the right direction…and Dick becomes a death-dealing mayhem-machine (albeit one requiring frequent naps).

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