“Robert Mueller [has failed] to turn up any reason for the investigations in two years’ worth of frenzied efforts to find something damaging about Trump”

Investigation that could potentially exonerate an innocent man branded absurd
Robert Mueller [and] his Justice Department predecessors [have failed] to turn up any reason for their investigations in two years’ worth of frenzied efforts to find something damaging about Trump….The sun is finally rising over the fact that there was never any excuse for this absurd investigation.
—Conrad, Lord Tubby. American Greatness, Nov. 20, 2018.

“Loyalty is extremely important to me. My family and close friends will say that I am loyal to a fault.”
Donald Trump changed parties seven times in 13 years and is not a partisan; he is a New Yorker accustomed to dealing with whomever is there and doing whatever is sensible.
—Ibid.

Now you, too, can account for your own criminal convictions through the magic of hyperbole
[U.S.] prosecutors should not win 99 percent of their cases, 97 percent without a trial….
—Ibid.

Among felony defendants whose cases were adjudicated within the one-year tracking period (89% of cases), 68% were convicted. This includes a 59% felony conviction rate with the remainder receiving misdemeanor convictions. Felony conviction rates were highest for defendants originally charged with motor vehicle theft (74%), a driving-related offense (73%), murder (70%), burglary (69%), or drug trafficking (67%). They were lowest for defendants originally charged with assault (45%).
—Source: U.S. Bureau of Justice Statistics,

Sadly, one of those activist Trump-appointed judges did not agree

CNN Sues White House for Using Doctored Video to Bar Jim Acosta: Spreading fake news has consequences
—vox.com, Nov 13, 2018.

This is the perfect illustration of the presumptuousness of the fake news press…. After Acosta attempted to filibuster the president’s post-midterm press conference and engage him in debate, the revocation of Acosta’s pass was an appropriate measure
—Conrad, Lord Tubby. American Greatness, Nov. 15, 2018.

One lord-a-leaping
He leapt like a trout.”
—Conrad Black, the future Lord Tubby, mocking then NDP finance critic Lorne Nystrom
for having been reeled in by a Frank Prank in 2000.

Even King John did not try to exercise the authority of Brussels before signing the Magna Carta in 1215. The British will not stand for this unceasing cascade of authoritarian directives from Brussels, purporting to decree everything from the number of newspapers in a delivery-person’s hand-off to a news agent, to how to stack vegetables in supermarkets, to a one-size-fits-all condom.
—Conrad, Lord Tubby, National Post, Nov. 16, 2018.

If Britain votes Brexit today, it…could also mark the beginning of the end of that prolific media staple, a Brussels hardy perennial that has coloured the way Britons view Europe—the euro-myth. Heard the one about the EU banning bagpipes? Bendy cucumbers? Children blowing up balloons? Or the one about it renaming yoghurt “fermented milk pudding?” What about the madness of the EU’s directives on eggs which, if you believe the various rumours, have to be stamped with the home address of the farmer, must not be sold by the dozen and can no longer be called “eggs,…” Rumours that the EU would introduce…a one-size-fits-all “euro condom” caused a great dealing of harrumphing in the 90s…. While standards of condom size were introduced across Europe, these were the responsibility of the European Committee on Standardisation, which is not an EU body.
—Kate Lyons, The Guardian, June 23, 2016.

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4 comments on ““Robert Mueller [has failed] to turn up any reason for the investigations in two years’ worth of frenzied efforts to find something damaging about Trump”
  1. mmedesevigne says:

    Oh, Tubby … Tubby. You’ll be talking out the other side of your gobsmacked mouth when Mueller finally lays his cards on the table. The Trump Kleptocracy will come to an end that will live in legend and song and give schadenfreude a whole new meaning.

  2. Alan Smithee says:

    Can’t wait for ‘TRUMP & TUBBY! The Musical!’ — Someone get on that, willya? Stat!

  3. OJM says:

    “Zut alors! A condom zat mght fit zuh French saucisson end zuh English stylo equally well…c’est totalement impossible!”

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